📌 Compliance Memo: Mandatory Rest Directive

Date: 29 August 2025
From: Office of Compliance & Integrity (OCI)
To: All Staff, Department of Self Love
Subject: Directive 01 – Mandatory Rest Periods

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With the Director currently on Me Time, and while we are eager to see what she returns with, the Office of Compliance & Integrity reminds all staff that the mission does not pause in her absence. Integrity requires continuity.

Accordingly, OCI issues the following directive:

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Directive 01: Mandatory Rest Periods

Policy:

• All departments must schedule and honour daily rest intervals.
• Rest includes, but is not limited to: sleep, naps, stillness, daydreaming, or quiet reflection.
• Substituting “doomscrolling,” “half-working,” or “pretending to meditate while checking emails” does not constitute compliance.

Audit Procedures:

• OCI will conduct unannounced inspections of calendars, to-do lists, and snack cupboards.
• Yawning in meetings will be considered prima facie evidence of non-compliance.

Enforcement:

• First breach → Written reminder.
• Second breach → Compulsory nap.
• Third breach → Department-wide quiet hour, enforced without exception.

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Closing Statement

Self love without rest is negligence. OCI will not allow this Department to collapse from exhaustion while claiming progress.

Filed without compromise,
Office of Compliance & Integrity
“Because neglecting rest is a breach of policy, not a badge of honour.”

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💡 Closing Anchor Line
Self love is not indulgence. It is compliance with the standards that keep us whole.