Internal Audit: Energy Allocation Review

Date: 18 July 2025
From: Director of Self Love
To: Early Morning Overthink Logs
Subject: Guilt Spiral, Triggered by a Cloudy Sky

Yesterday’s cloudy sky took more from me than it should have.

Not just light, but energy – the kind I spent refreshing weather apps, calculating imaginary drying timelines, and sitting in yet another meeting with my inner critic about productivity.
A full internal debate… over laundry.

It’s strange how something so small can spiral:
A decision unmade. A sense of missed opportunity.
The invisible tax of thinking in loops.

Today, I reallocated.

It rained. No park. No sky watching.
Just a walk through the mall – fluorescent lights instead of sunbeams, air conditioning instead of breeze.
And yet, I was present.

No big revelations. No cinematic breakthroughs.
Just the quiet satisfaction of moving my body, noticing my surroundings, and choosing not to slip into autopilot.

There’s something to be said for presence – especially when the setting feels mundane.
I didn’t walk to shop, or to escape. I walked to stay with myself.

Small steps still shift energy.
And today, I’m glad I took them.

Signed,
Director of Self Love
(reclaiming myself)